Part of my “journey to a VBAC” includes arming myself with knowledge. Lots and lots and lots of reading. Not just about VBACs, but also about c-sections and what questions to know to ask and what to expect in ANY situation <--- that's the area that needs the most work. I need to be prepared, not surprised. I need an answer to every option.
And with all that reading, I’m bound to come across horror stories. Stories that make me want to jump, grab someone and shake them, and shout from the rooftops WHY?! HOW?! THIS HAS TO STOP. and then I burst into tears.
There’s a VBAC (vaginal birth after cesarean) support forum at babycenter.com. While browsing, I came across a birth story from a woman, posted just 2 days ago (2.21).
No, she did not use the term “birth rape,” I did. What is birth rape? “Birth rape is the violence and assault women are subjected to by those they are trusting to safely care for them while they give birth. It is ignoring a woman’s refusal of procedure. It is anything which in any other situation would be considered assault.”
I know some people think the term is extreme. But what is done to some women is absolutely rape, just not in the “traditional” sense you’re used to hearing about. I had my membranes stripped without consent. I was coerced into being cut open when it wasn’t necessary. Is that birth rape? Eh, I don’t know.
But what happened to this woman? Absofrickinglutely.
***Warning: the following story may be a trigger.***
You really should go read her birth story, because it’s her story, not mine. But to sum it up: this woman, trying for a VBAC (with what she thought was a willing and trustworthy OB/midwife group), was cut open without consent. Ohhhh, and it’s much worse than that. She was taken into the OR “just in case” where they switched her oxygen mask for a “better one,” which turned out to actually be a gas mask. When she woke up from her unexpected sleep????? Her baby had been “born” and she had a new scar on her abdomen.
CAN YOU EVEN BELIEVE IT.
Please tell me you’re as outraged as I am. I hope to God or Buddha or Brad Pitt or whoever you pray to that these people get what they deserve. I hope she sues. I wish there was something I could do (like kick some ass).
Illegal. Abuse. Assault. Birth rape.
Visit this mama’s story, send her well wishes, congratulate her on her lil one. And spread the word–this is NOT acceptable.
If they get away with this? What good would it even do for me to prepare myself for a VBAC (in a hospital)? What good would it be to arm myself with knowledge? If they can so easily trick you and force you into an unnecessary c-section? This makes me afraid of birth, when I never was before. This makes me never want to step foot in a hospital again.